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You’ve heard the statement the “Teacher appears when the student is ready”, Boy was I ready-PARENTING, you receive no formal training, possibly have a background with cracks, together with the pressing demands of living life in the 21st century. I was stuck in a rant, rave, rescue cycle, diverting from the strict controlling drill sergeant parent, to the helicopter rescue parent, to the guilty powerless beating myself up parent. It wasn’t fun for me or my kids.
My Angel appeared, she had 4 kids from ages 4-11, and I had 2 ages 7 and 10. Holly was her name and with holy ease I saw her connect with her children in ways that I could only dream of. I couldn’t get my kids to comply to anything without an argument and tension.
Connecting with Holy was a life line, and now I was ready with renewed confidence to experiment with the skills she was using, which happened to be the Love and LogicTM approach.
The immediate changes were:
- In leaving on time in the morning without the stress and tension of getting everyone ready.
- The level of disrespect decreasing in our home,
- The children becoming more responsible. STOREY, The Lunch Box.
Do you ever have kids, or the school ring you because your children forgot their lunch?
I explained to my children that they can get their school food ready now.
Third day in, I come home from the school run, and see my daughters lunch box on the bench. At 11.00am I receive a call from the school informing me that my daughter is at the office and has asked me to bring her lunch. Oh, that’s so sad I respond, I wonder what she wants to do about that. It’s tough when you’re hungry. Unfortunately, I am not heading in that direction. My daughter is handed the phone, demanding I come to the school with her lunch, and I reiterate the response, and ask her what does she want to do, typically her response is, I don’t know. Would you like some ideas, I inquire, I suggested 3 ideas and asked how would that work out for you, she didn’t like any, my final response was “I know you are powerful and can work it out, see you tonight I love you”.
Obviously, I felt a little worried, and was wondering what she would do. At 3.30pm school pick up, my daughter was happy and had some of her brother’s food and a morning snack from a teacher, and over the last 3 years her food has not been left at home on the bench.
I have loved my parenting transformation journey from what seemed like failure, to having fun, feeling, empowered, and strong. Most importantly, I have been inspired by my children’s growth in resilience, respect, responsibility and courage.
I look forward to share tips, journeys, seasons, and techniques through real life stories to inspire HOPE, and courage, in putting fun back into your parenting, and healthy connections in your family.